Jaded Times

Why do Americans pay so much attention to Glenn Beck, a Roman Catholic born man who abandoned his faith (divorced/converted to Mormonism), spent a decade of his life addicted to coke, turned his mother’s accidental drowning into a sympathy-pandering “suicide”, and went from shock-jock to political commentator?  I suppose he’s sort of like the kid in your grade school class who used to eat the paste; you can’t stop watching him do it, but you don’t want to invite him to join you at lunch…

Old paste-eater is at it again, though, this time claiming that the theory of evolution, which is based on literally centuries of research, testing, observation, and rational theory and thought, is ridiculous because he has never seen a “half-monkey, half-person“.  Though to his credit, he did add “yet”.

“They have to force it down your throat. When anybody has to force it — it’s a problem.”

Um, Glenn?  have you seen or heard your own show?  I did, for research, last night; talk about forcing, I feel like you owed me $50 and a wet nap.

Also this:

“You didn’t have to force that the world was round. Truth is truth.”

Actually, that did have to be forced.  In fact, the Catholic Church (the faith you grew up in and abandoned) tortured people who claimed it was, like Galileo, and didn’t publicly concede the point until 1992.  In fact, there are still some idiots who persist in the theory that it isn’t.

His claims that not witnessing an unrelated, unreal being somehow makes the theory of evolution “ridiculous” allows us to use the transitive property to disprove all sorts of stuff: for example, I bet he’s never seen the Widow of Zarephath, therefor his own faith must also be ridiculous.

THIS JUST IN: photo of half man, half monkey found!

You’re welcome, Mr. Beck.

(source for opening claims)

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Or rather, she was quoted in an interview on MSNBC saying that Jews need to “be perfected“.  As in many arguments I’ve encountered in my life, I again point to Sarah Silverman and say “done and done“.

I’d also just like to point out that, thus far, this has not hit the RSS feeds as headline news, which is both a testament to the superiority of the internet (over television, at any rate) as well as a solid indication that we are still yet to find anyone who cares what Anne Coulter thinks.

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Stupid, stupid art.

“They came back and asked what my problem was. I told them I had one hand full of snake and the other hand full of plane. They cleared me in.”

Indeed.

(article link)

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The TomKat baby is here.  And what the hell do I know, it could win a freakin Nobel Prize some day.  Let’s just hope it doesn’t take its parents too seriously.

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I’m beginning to believe that FOXNews.com has hired someone from the Bush administration, as their recent article choices have, well, left something to be desired. And that something isn’t ass.

I mean, some of my previous posts might imply that I’m not FOX News’ biggest fan, but come on, whoever decided to post this piece (originally run in NYPOST.com, which is even more tragic) should really be examined for signs of mini-stroke or mental retardation.

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The University of Pittsburgh has released a study that says that people who play violent video games are more likely to think it is acceptable to smoke pot, according to Reuters. One can only assume that the next study will focus on whether people in bars are more likely to drink alcohol than people in church.

Well done, U of P!  Here’s some extra info for you:  I smoke pot while watching Golden Girls reruns.  Give Scalia a call, I bet you can get a warrant out for Bea Arthur.

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Free “alternative-to-sleazy-dating-sites” Myspace announced today that it would go to great lengths to ensure that parents need not involve themselves in their children’s lives. The announcement follows strict criticism from lazy liberal and religious nut conservative parents alike that the site was not doing enough to protect their children, and will include various steps such as children safety ads.

The company has also announced it will appoint a security czar to oversee child safety.

One can only hope that this move allows American parents to continue ignoring their obligation to raise and educate their children, thus allowing more time to view spin-offs of CSI and Law and Order (the former of which is planning a new serial CSI: Myspace for fall 2006).

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I grew up believing in the importance of newsmen to inform the public and to hold the people in power responsible . . . I hope we serve the brave journalists well with this piece. They were true patriots and should be remembered as such.

George Clooney

A few assorted observations from the post-screening panel I attended last evening which featured Clooney (director, co-writer and actor), Grant Heslov (co-writer) and Ray Wise (actor):

Clooney, whose father was a newscaster in Cincinnati, Ohio (and even cooler “At the time of George’s birth, worked as air personality on Lexington, Kentucky station WKYT, hosting Saturday afternoon dance party and Saturday night horror movie.” souce: IMDB), said that his father told him that the most important thing to do in the film was to get their facts straight. This way you leave people little ammunition with which to easily discredit you and your project.

When Clooney and Heslov were initially marketing the film no one wanted to touch it. They were getting beat up. As Clooney said at the time it wasn’t even “with us or against us” it was “with us or with the enemy”. Clooney was traitorboy on a magazine cover and featured in the Traitor Deck of Cards as the Queen of Hearts. Queen of Hearts! – he feels that if he had to be a card he should have at least been an ace perhaps.

A black and white film was more terrifying (*horror scream*) to studio execs than any sort of political climate. One of those “automatic shut off valves”. As a result of this the funds were raised independently, then Warner Independent came on board because they believed in the movie.

My research led me to this Daily Show clip for y’all – a taste of what I got last night.

A girl who was in “From Dusk Till Dawn” with Clooney was selected for the the last question. Well, she wasn’t the only one in the audience who had acted alongside one of the film’s actors.

Dusk Till Dawn - what about Speech 101
Special Mention: Helen Slayton-Hughes as Paley’s secretary a collegue of mine from Speech 101. We were suppose to be listed in IMDB but alas no entry – there is, however, an official looking movie poster. Anyway, she’s an excellent character and it was great to see her.

Having lived in the United States over the past four year for me this quote alone is a testament as to why the movie is worth seeing:

We must not confuse dissent with disloyalty. We must remember always that accusation is not proof and that conviction depends upon evidence and due process of law. We will not walk in fear, one of another.

Edward R. Murrow

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Don’t be a naysayer!
Ok be one . . . I don’t really know how I feel about about this either. I mean hell yeah, sure I remember when only assholes had cellphones. But I think we’ve really turned the corner on that concept, cuz now puppies can have them too. And they’re awesome! (even if companies finding yet another way to push a material products on us isn’t)

Some components of the dog cell phone are big brotherish:

The PetCell will also have an option called GeoFence that will alert owners whenever their dog wanders beyond preset parameters, and built-in temperature sensors to indicate if the dog is too hot or cold.

Now of course I don’t want Fido to get lost either, but I sure wouldn’t want someone monitoring my parameters; I need to freely roam a wide quadrilateral area so let’s hope that this option is not misused.

The phones are not quite ready for Garfield’ use.

One obvious user is left out of this calling plan. At 3 inches long, the PetCell is too unwieldy for your average feline.

But I’m sure it will be soon. My cat is very vocal and gifted with a wide vocabulary so I’m surprised he hasn’t designed one yet; though he’s pretty much a homebody so he finds landlines fulfill his needs.

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David Cross posted an open letter to Larry the Cable Guy on the Mr. Show site. The letter, apparently a response to an attack “Larry” made in his recent book, was intended to clear up a few misconceptions that he was apparently operating under:

I mean you, Dan Whitney, the guy who’s name the bank account is under. You were born and raised in Nebraska (hardly The South), went to private school and moved to Florida when you were 16…on page 89 you say in reference to the “gee-shucks” millionaire comment, “…see, to his (David’s) mind, bein’ well paid means I’m no longer real and I can’t be a country boy anymore. It’s just an act.” Hey, it’s always been an act! That’s my fucking point! You admit it yourself so cut the indignation shit.

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